Tag Archives: lying

What Everyone Can Learn From Ray Rice and Bob McDonnell


In the past week, two high profile people were sent resounding messages by the court of public opinion and in one case, a jury of his peers. That message said that you should just tell the truth right from the start, instead of trying to carry people in the hope that they won’t be smart enough to put two and two together.

Ray Rice. Poor Ray Rice, and poor Janay Rice, and poor Rayven Rice. “I made a huge mistake, and I want to own it.” are the words that Ray Rice said in a press release this morning after being released by the Ravens football team. And yet, those who saw the original video where he dragged the lifeless body of his fiance out of the elevator and let her fall into a slump face down on the floor wonder when it was that he actually decided that it was a huge mistake. Did he know it was a mistake when he was kicking her legs out of the way of the elevator doors, or was it when he realized that his punch knocked her face into a rail and rendered her unconscious? No, those weren’t the times when he knew he had made a huge mistake, because he chose his career and multi-million dollar contract over telling the truth. It appears that the “huge mistake” he references is the one where he got caught, and (now) has no choice but to own it.

Similarly, Bob McDonnel, who was convicted on 11 felony charges in his corruption trial, thought that his definition of “corruption” was different than the one that jury had. According to THIS story, he painted himself to the media as a straight-laced guy who was a former military man and devoted family guy. As a result, no one would have expected the reality to be any different than the story: until undisputable facts surfaced that told a different story.

Sometimes, it really just comes down to being a case of did you do it, or not, without all the legal mumbo-jumbo that lawyers will try to bring onto the scene in order to distract everyone from that core question. The jury didn’t buy the argument that he didn’t know that what he was doing was wrong. And the public haven’t bought the story that Ray Rice didn’t know his vicious role in what happened in that elevator, or the possible price he might pay if it was discovered as it has now been.

As the saying goes: an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.




To start things

lies in the truthThere’s so much that will be covered on this website, that it’s almost hard to decide where to start! I suppose a good place to start is from the present, and work my way backwards. First, a foundation:

Learning that a person that you trusted was someone that you should NOT have trusted, is a hard pill to swallow. Learning that they were essentially lying to you right from the start, is also hard to accept. There’s something in each of us that WANTS to believe that the people that we allow into our lives, into our beds, and into our homes were deserving of the trust that we gave them by allowing them access to us. When we also take steps to trust them with our children and with our hearts, it can take us that much more by surprise to learn that the trust we placed in them was ill-placed.

I’ve been talking to people about the word “trust”. I’ve been reading great books about “trust” and “betrayal”. I’ve also been witnessing the effects all around me of the havoc that has been wreaked upon people who have also put their trust in people (and companies run by people) who were only looking out for themselves. How many friends of yours have been burned by someone that they shouldn’t have trusted? How many friends of yours are reluctant, or have flat-out decided NOT to try again, because they haven’t healed from the devastation caused by someone who did not have their best interests in mind? Are you yourself one of those people who has decided that they will NEVER allow anyone to be able to get that close again, to be able to do anymore damage?

We rely on what people say, the statements that they make, to determine whether we should stick around for more, or run for the hills. On this site, I will make efforts to personalize my writing so that you will be able to hopefully relate to what this site is all about. TRUST, BETRAYAL, and fighting because you are hoping and praying that the majority of people in our country actually DO want to do the “right thing” by their fellow humans, is what this site is about, at its core.

I’ve been asking friends and colleagues of mine two questions.

One, “do you think that we’ve gotten so used to people lying, that we have come to expect it now and are pleasantly surprised if someone isn’t lying?”

And two,

“do you think that the majority or minority of people give a damn about whether there is an epidemic of fraud and lying all around us?”

I’m interested in hearing your comments on this. The Facebook page that accompanies this, will be up and running soon. For now, you’ll need to put your comments here, please. 🙂  We intend to put a new post up, at least every other day, so check back with us often. Please tell us your vote on the poll question. Before we ask for help in catching our fish, we need to make sure that you actually CARE about fishing!

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